Treadmills abound in our life. If you are enamored by things, then you become a victim of the hedonic treadmill. If it is money that lights you up, the result is what I call overdrive. And finally, if it is achievements you crave, then you will fall victim to the achievement treadmill.
The problem here is simple. You can’t purpose your way to enough. What do I mean by this? In the examples above, we have chosen to define our purpose as things, money, or achievements. These are horrible attempts at purpose. As you are familiar from my previous rants, purpose shouldn’t be goal oriented. It should be process oriented. In other words, you shouldn’t fall in love with the things, money, or achievements—you should fall in love with the journey to get them.
Why do we choose such poor goal-oriented versions of purpose? Mainly, I think, because we feel a pervasive and rather painful lack of enoughness. We all carry around these metaphorical oversized holes in our hearts left over from past traumas and misgivings. We subconsciously tell ourselves that if we just buy enough things, make enough money, or conquer enough achievements, that we will finally feel happy.
Treadmills, however, are a cruel thing. No matter how much we buy, make, or achieve, we hedonically adapt—habituate—back to a baseline level of happiness (or should I say miserableness). We quickly find ourselves searching for the next high, the next thing to stuff into the great hole in our hearts to try to fill us up.
And it doesn’t work. You have to heal the hole first through a better understanding of meaning and telling yourself better stories about yourself and your past. Once you do that, you realize that purpose was never meant to make you feel enough. In fact, purpose is the icing on the cake of enoughness.
Like I said, you can’t purpose your way to enough. But once you feel enough already, you can purpose your way to happiness.
Now that makes sense, doesn’t it?
Today’s Poll
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Path to Purpose Coaching
Over the last year, writing my new book The Purpose Code, I have spent a huge amount of time thinking about, writing about, and discussing purpose. I have offered one-on-one and group coaching to my mastermind group, Wealth With Purpose. These discussions stem from my real life encounters with dying hospice patients as well as the numerous interactions I have had with people after reading Taking Stock.
What I've found is that most of us who listen to the Earn & Invest Podcast struggle with three basic issues:
How do I define purpose in my life?
How do I transition to a more fulfilling career?
What is enough money look like? Enough life?
To help navigate these waters, I have decided to offer the Path to Purpose coaching program. This is one-on-one coaching with me to help you further define purpose, direction, and career. Sessions will be spread over five weeks with a goal to provide a more concrete and enjoyable path to crack the purpose code and start living your life now whether you are broke, pre financial independence, financially independent, or beyond.
https://www.earnandinvest.com/coaching